My sweet Lily girl -
With each passing year, it seems like
time is picking up speed. I remember 4 years ago today how the whole
world stood still for a moment as our eyes met for the first time. I
will never forget how it felt to hold my firstborn child – you –
in all of your fresh, untainted beauty. I had to catch my breath.
From that day on, God has gifted us with a relationship that has
surpassed all I had imagined. I am constantly fascinated by the work
He is accomplishing inside of you. Though I am exposed every day to
how bright, perceptive and lovely you are, I still at times am caught
off guard by how amazing is the masterpiece of you. Having you in my
life gives me reason upon reason to praise our Father. You are a
treasure.
Without a doubt, the most exciting
element of this past year was seeing your faith develop. Your desire
to know God more is one of my greatest joys. I look forward every
day to all of your questions and the many comments you make that give
me a window into your heart. One day this year you said, “God is
the biggest, best, boss ever!” I laughed but mixed with the humor
was a deep gratitude within me. I hope that you hold onto that view,
your passion ever increasing. Most nights at dinner, you volunteer
to pray and as you do, Daddy and I glance at each other with tears in
our eyes. One that I remember recently went something like this:
“Dear God, I thank you for my family. I pray we have good
relationships. Sometimes I do bad things. Thank you that Jesus died
on the cross to save me from my sins. Amen.”
This year I have been surprised by
everything you are able to do on your own. Somewhere along the way,
you've learned to run the tech devices in our home, get yourself
dressed, empty the dishwasher and even make a smoothie. I was
impressed by that one, coming down the stairs to see you had gathered
all of the necessary ingredients, poured them in the blender and
stood there on your step stool with a big grin on your face, happy
with your accomplishment.
You love to make forts, rearrange our
dining room furniture and couch cushions, play with water and pretend
play with your dolls and stuffed animals. Most of these interests
create extra work for me but isn't that why I do what I do anyway?
I'm in the ministry of availability and sacrifice and although it's
challenging, there's just nothing else I'd rather be doing. Inside
the walls of our home, I've grown more than in any other context.
Being your mom is the best. And for the sake of keeping things real,
I distinctly recall a moment when I was doing dishes and you had
squeezed yourself between me and the cabinet, making it difficult for
me to get my task finished. I sternly said, “Lily, please move!”
You immediately burst into tears and said “I just wanted to be
with you!”. Oh, how that crushed me. And I'm glad it did. That
scene sticks with me. I want to listen to you with not only my ears
but with my eyes and heart. You'll grow to learn that this world wages war in
the form of distractions. There are so many things that beg for my
attention but none of them compare to the two little gifts God
through His grace has given – you and your brother. I did fail
that day. Failure is a part of life. But one thing was
evident...God always stands ready to forgive. And when He does, all
is restored. I'm thankful the moment ended with us cuddling, able to
talk about messing up and forgiveness.
I love seeing you nurture Silas. With
his rough-and-tumble personality, someone usually winds up getting
hurt! The moments, though, where hugs and kisses are exchanged bring
a warmth to our lives, reminding me of the gift you have in each
other. You are always eager to guide him. He is surely blessed to
have a sister who loves him the way you do.
The affection you and Daddy share is
worth more than pure gold. The light in your eyes when he holds you
close says it all. Every evening when he goes upstairs to change out
of his work clothes, you ask him in a sweet, soft voice, “Can you
wear a shirt that I can pull on?”. We discovered that you love to
snuggle up to him and pull a piece of his shirt between your fingers.
When he asked you why, you said “Because it makes me feel safe.”
I'm so thankful you have a father who is a reflection of our
heavenly Father who takes great delight in both adoring and
protecting you.
I wonder what great things I'll have to
talk about next year that God did in and through you. I am sure
there will be laughter, tears, adventures, sibling rivalries and
something to be thankful for at every turn. When we let God's word
define us, we know who we are and where we are going. You can trust
me to do my best to teach you those things. How blessed I am to
enter into every moment with you, expectantly looking to see what we
might learn together. Just as you tell me with each sunrise or
sunset we encounter - “That's God at work!” - let's find out what
else He'll do in our midst, shall we? My oh my, how I love you.
Happy 4th Birthday, Lily.
Mommy
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